i outsmarted the hand of the holy
that's what i'm seeing
ten fingers confirming i nearly
missed another beating
half-hearted, i shoot up a gaze
stare into thin air and beg for her grace
'cos i know no man never went long
without begging forgiveness
please just don't bait and switch me to a previous state
turn it up if you'll hear me out
y'know, i wish you wouldn't flinch
please just don't rearrange me to a former face
'cos i'm running out of ways to live
and lord, i wish you didn't know the half of it
moving onward and ever upward
and puffing up my chest like "huhpfh"
must be a cut above the rest
there's a reason that i feel like "huhpfh"
but all around i'm seeing reminders of what just was
feel cheated, don't wanna know that i'm
one step from being a meaningless being
and it'll be okay when
there'll be nothing to nay-say
and if i manage keep myself awake…or away...